Today has been hard. It’s one of those days I get caught up remembering the past…and feeling condemned by it. My grandmother passed away almost two years ago on August 5, 2015. She was 91 years old.
She suffered initially from congestive heart failure, which became the catalyst for dementia and Alzheimer’s. Although we don’t know for certain, we also think she had stomach cancer at the end.
Visiting her in the hospital was a reminder that I let opportunities slip by.
My grandmother was a master in crafting, food, gardening, dancing, bowling, fishing, Uno; you name it she excelled in it.
Before she became ill, Dan and I would take her out Friday nights for our date night. I made her sit up front in the truck with Dan, and she would jokingly say, “I’m on a date with Daniel—don’t be jealous!” We shared so many card games, naps during Jeopardy, and amazing homemade cuisine with my grandma. She had so many skills and trades like quilting, crochet, and cooking that I mistakenly thought, “I’ll learn some other time.”
Except “some other time” never came. She got sick, and because of dementia and Alzheimer’s, she couldn’t remember how to do anything. At times, she couldn’t even remember me.
When I realized I didn’t have access to her the way I always did I was wrecked. How could I let her amazing wisdom and knowledge be an afterthought?
How could I shortchange my grandmother like that? I’ve lost the precious parts of her legacy—my legacy—because I was too caught up in my own life I thought I could just “do it later?”
Friends, let me be the cautionary tale—because I didn’t just do this once. I did it twice. First with my grandmother, and then with my best friend—literally within 6 months of each other.
I put off seeing him because of scheduling. Yeah, right. I should have made the time to see him. Again, I made the mistake of “I can see him later.”
Except, later never came. He was tragically killed in a car accident in the prime of his life.
It is not enough to have good intentions to spend time with the people we claim to love. In so many ways I am haunted by my lack of zeal to seek them both out. Now I carry the burden that is so rightfully mine to bear.
In this measure I failed to treasure Christ in both of them. It is something I live with each and every single day.
Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit.” Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that.” But as it is, you boast in your arrogance; all such boasting is evil. Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.” –James 3:14-17 NASB
The truth is I had time—and so do you.
Don’t make the mistake of believing you have time. Don’t take chances on your “some days.”
Because “some days” turn into present tense days where you have to live with the choices you’ve made.
Before it’s too late, consider your family. Consider your friends. Consider a stranger whom you feel the uncanny presence of the Spirit with.
Those are the “some days” I’d give every penny I own to show the Lord I knew the treasure I possessed.